Category Archives: Gender

Sexism in different shapes and sizes

It seems like society finally have started to realize the importance of feminism and equality between genders, well at least the Swedish society. But the other day when I was browsing the internet I came across something that made me think. What I saw was the backside of equality that we almost never talk about. The Beckham family had released some photos of their son, Romeo Beckham. Romeo is about eleven years old. So far there was nothing wrong, but when i started to look through the comments on the photos something struck my mind.

A lot of people, especially girls had commented things like: ‘’The stuff i would do to this guy, Oh my so hot, please sleep with me!’’ And nobody seemed to even bother. I mean, what they’re doing is practically implementing that they’d like to have a sexual relation with an eleven year old boy – pedophilia. What caught my attention was the fact that nobody cared, I mean how can you just ignore people who say that they’d like to engage in pedophilia. My theory is that nobody cared because the ‘’victim’’ was i male and the pedophiles were female. Can you just imagine if it were the other way around? If grownup men said these things about little girls or boys? I imagine they’d be tracked down by the FBI in a matter of hours.

Sexism is not just about exposed women who are being objectified, but this is sexism too. Assuming that just because little Romeo Beckham is a male he should be okay with being made in to an object, even though he is just a little boy. Society needs to get rid of all kind sexism, and start to look at things like this in a different way.  So my final words will be:

Hey FBI, track down all the pedophiles, not just the disgusting male ones who live in their mothers basement eating Doritos and and looking for cheap flights to the Philippines or Thailand all day.

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5 Reasons to smash the patriarchy

Read the text in the link below before you continue:

 

http://www.returnofkings.com/21313/5-reasons-to-date-a-girl-with-an-eating-disorder

 

We’ve read this article written by “Tuthmosis” named “5 reasons to date a girls with an eating disorder”. Tuthmosis have written down five reasons to date a girl with eating disorder. These five reasons are the following: Her obsession over her body will improve her overall looks, She costs less money, She is fragile and vulnerable, She probably has money of her own, She is better in bed. He has also written an explanation after every point.

The following text is our respond to this stupid article:

 

5 Reasons to smash the patriarchy

 

1. A woman has unhealthy ideals.

 

The main reason why so many girls develop an eating disorder is because of the many ideals that exist in out society. Women are told to be skinny, to have big breasts, to be well trained (but of course not to well-trained because that will make her look like a man). She should have a pretty face, nice hair and perfect skin. This causes low self-confidence, pressure and a feeling of not be good enough. Why do we have to try to look a special way when we know we all look different?

2. Women are expected to please their men.
In all times women have been the ones who should listen to their men and follow their decisions through life. Because of the equal opportunities and the gain of feminism, the idea of that women are made to please the men is vanishing away from our current society. “Tuthmosis” describes eating disorder as a way to turn back the society to the “right” position. We think this is some bullshit. No one should be made to please someone else. Unfortunately, that’s not how it is today. Women are supposed to be thoughtful; to put someone else’s needs before her own and, of course, to look good, but not for herself but for the people around her.

Further on, Tuthmosis hasn’t described the sickness from the perspective of a person who is suffering with the disorder. It’s described as a benefit for the other half of the relationship, in this case, the man. The eating disorder has “qualities” like making the man save money because the girl won’t order a normal size portion, or making the man more powerful by using the effect of the girl’s low self-confidence. It will also insure the man a girlfriend with the “perfect body”, because she will always try to look “fit and trim”. If a person wants to find love, that person shouldn’t exploit someone else’s suffering.

3. A woman doesn’t have as much power as a man.

 

In Sweden, witch we say is “the worlds most equal country” we’ve never had a female prime minister. In the parliament there are 157 women and 192 men. Compared to the rest of the world that’s very good numbers, but is it really equal?

 

4.The men are the norm- the women are the exception.

 

Why is it so, that when we hear someone mention a football team, we automatically think about men. It’s not until someone says “the women’s team” we think about the women. And why does many languages contain words that exclude women, even though they are words that are applied on women. As an example, it happens that we say  “en kvinnlig ordningsman” in Swedish.

 

5. The average women earn less money than the average man.

 

Let’s say that a woman and a man have the same profession and do the same tasks. Then it would feel like a matter of course that these two people should be paid an equal amount of money. Then why (why, why, why) isn’t this imagination applied in our real society? The fact that the average man earns 20% more than the average woman is unacceptable and it’s also pure discrimination.

 

To conclude: We are tired of people like “Tuthmosis” who do nothing but build up our already giant patriarchy instead of SMASHING IT!

//yoloswagbruden and mlbegoden

Barbie – A Criticized Doll

In March 1959, a new doll was introduced. The american doll was named Barbie and it was going to face a great success worldwide. The woman behind the criticized doll is Ruth Handler and she has made a fortune on the doll. You can find Barbie in more than 140 countries and she has been produced in more than a billion copies. There are many different opinions about Barbie and we are going to write about some of them.

Barbie has influenced the fashion industry and many people see her as a fashion icon. The ones who are positive to her existence think that she is a great inspiration, because they consider her as an independent young woman. During her “life” she’s had more than a hundred different careers, such as an astronaut, a doctor and a president. President-Barbie is ahead of our time because of the fact that USA never has had a female president.

The people who are negative towards Barbie thinks that her unrealistic body measurements creates unhealthy body ideal. When young children play with the doll, they can get a perception how a good-looking body is supposed to look like. If a real woman should have the same measurements as Barbie, her length would be close to two meters, she would weigh about 45 kg and her bmi would be around 15. An adult, who has a bmi under 18.5, counts as underweight and for most people these measurements are totally unrealistic.

The ones who are positive to Barbie maybe think that a child doesn’t notice the ideal female body that the doll represents. For example, when we were little kids we played with Barbie and we can’t remember thinking of Barbie’s body back then. Even though most people understand that the doll is just a doll, we think that it make people feel an unaware pressure of trying to reach a certain appearance. Therefore we are very happy that the company that makes the Barbie doll has showed a suggestion of a new Barbie doll with realistic body measurements. We would like to see dolls on the market that are tall, short, thick and thin, and that have different hair and skin colors. We believe that it would make children understand that an ideal is invented and that the ideal doesn’t exist because of the fact that everyone looks different.

//Majaolle & Isadora

When will the good girls go bad?

You’re a little girl, only six years old. It’s your first day at school. Excitement fills your body, you feel pumped up, but at the same time a bit nervous. Will you find friends? Will the teacher be nice to you? Will you manage the homeworks?

You’re a little girl, only six years old. It’s your first day at school and you’re still unaware of the fact that school will destroy you one day.

Almost every third woman between the ages of 16-24 suffers from anxiety, uneasieness or worrying (SCB, rapporten “Ohälsa och Sjukvård 1980-2005”). More than every fifth woman between the ages of 16-29 has or has had thoughts of committing suicide (Statens folkhälsoinstitut, 2012). Eighth per cent of the women in the study has tried to commit suicide. More women, 46 %, than men, 37 %, continues their studies after high school (Scb, utbildningsregistret) but still men earns more money. 28 % of the men has a high income, while the same study shows that only 12 % of the women has an income over average.

Well. This doesn’t have to prove anything, right? It’s only statistics. Why does this prove that the so called good girl-syndrome is more common among girls? The thing is that this doesn’t prove anything- this strengthens so many personal stories that have been told and to be told by many, many girls and women all over the world.

We live in a society where girls feel a pressure to study hard to even get a chance to get the same opportunities as a man, and even though they study so much there almost isn’t room for anything else, it’s still not good enough. Performance anxiety has been shown to the possibilities of panic attacks, anorexia, self-harm, stress and depression.

I have personally experienced this. I have cried over tests, thinking that I won’t be able to do anything with my life. I’ve been choosing to do my math homework instead of hanging out with friends. I’ve been sitting in a dark room, so filled up with anxiety that I never wanted to go out again. I’ve been trying to hurt myself in every possible way. I’ve tried way too many different diets. I’ve been having such extreme anxiety attacks that I’ve wanted to end my life.

Sadly, these feelings are very common. There are way too many girls living with performance anxiety. Of course, there are not only girls who suffer from the good girl-syndrome. It occurs to boys as well, but the thing is that there are more girls than boys who do- it is the norm. That’s why I, and many more, like to refer to it as the good girl- syndrome. Anyhow, no matter if it occurs to more girls than boys, the question is; how do we end this? How can we end these feelings to keep coming all the time, to be there inside of us, scratching on the inside?

The way I see it, it can be fixed on two different levels – individual and general. General, we need to do something with our society. We have to stop the fact that men earn more money than women just because they were born with a penis. We have to stop the fact that even though women generally are more well-educated they often make less money. We have to stop the fact that girls are expected to be quiet in the classroom and take care of the screaming, annoying boys. These are only a few examples that lead to the statistics shown above. Sadly, it takes time to correct these issues.

That’s why we have to start individually. If you feel stressed out about school- go have a coffee with your friends. If you feel sad because of a test- eat a piece of chocolate to celebrate the next time you did good. If you feel that neither of this will work; go and speak with someone. A mom, a friend, a teacher, a therapist. I did. And it has actually begun to work.

So my advice to all of you out there, all of you who has always done what you’ve been told to do, who has always done your homework, who has prioritized a test before friends- let loose. Go crazy. Life is way too short to cry over an essay about socio-linguistics, but it sure does have plenty of time to laugh, dance for a whole night, sing in the rain, kiss pretty people at parties, eat cinnamon buns and fall in love. Stop being a good girl/boy- go “bad” and fail a test once in a while- your life won’t be ruined, I promise you.

/mmelancholy

Answer to ”5 reasons to date a girl with eating disorders”

This article disgusts me. It makes me really angry and almost makes me tear my hair off my head. In the article Thuthmosis tell us that eating disorders is not only ok but also sexualizes it and paints it out like a benefit. How could an illness that makes thousands of girls feel miserable and worthless ever be positive?

In my opinion it can never be. But this does Thuthmosis obviously don’t understand. I think it’s upsetting that Thuthmosis think that it is his right to discuss whether a girl with eating disorders is better to date or not. It is objectifying and oppressing since as usual the women doesn’t have a say in it at all and are supposed to passively wait and be chosen by the man.

Thuthmosis also mention “fragile and vulnerable” as a desirable quality among woman which reinforces the stereotypes of a woman being weak and someone who needs to be taken care of.

Another obnoxious thing is that Thuthmosis writes about is how ”the list doesn’t apply to emotional eaters, food addicts, and fatties with no self-control” which shows that all that he actually cares about is the girl being skinny or not. It also creates a feeling of guilt for those who don’t fit in his categories of what a “positive” eating disorder is.

Also I think it’s sickening that he chooses not to concentrate on the girl with an illness’s wellbeing but how men could benefit from it.

Finally I just wanted to say that the thing is that Thuthmosis or any other man shouldn’t be telling a girl about how she should be since everyone should be able to be themselves. Everyone should be able to be weak, strong, angry, pleasant, nervous or stable. You should also be able to perform poorly and be worth exactly the same as everybody else because your human value is constant no matter what.

Who needs feminism?

The mean old man next-door needs feminism. He is drowning from the inside because men aren’t supposed to shed tears.

The girl who just won a race and the boy who came second need feminism. The spotlight is still shining bright on the boy. Uncomfortably bright. He lost to a girl. The girl remains in the shadows only being lit up now and again to emphasize the boy’s loss.

The unborn children of tomorrow need feminism. Their lives and choices should be their own. Not the ones society has cut out for them.

The girl you sat next to on the tube needs feminism. She thinks her worth is defined by how many or how few guys she sleeps with.

The guy you sat next to on the bus needs feminism. He thinks his worth is defined by how many or how few girls he sleeps with.

The two monsters hiding under your bed need feminism. They just want to be loved for who they really are.

The media needs feminism. Where do I even begin?

The woman you walked past on your way home today needs feminism. She was being asked what she was wearing the night she got raped.

The boy you thought you saw yesterday needs feminism. She was born in the wrong body. She can’t tell anyone.

Girls who wear a lot of makeup and revealing clothes need feminism. It’s completely up to them what they like to wear. Shut up.

That guy needs feminism. You all know who I’m talking about. He’s a jerk.

A little boy sitting in his room thinking about who he used to be needs feminism. He has given up something he loves out of fear of being bullied.

All those who died, and keep dying, fighting for a world where everyone is equal need feminism. So their sacrifices weren’t made in vain.

A girl on the other side of the world needs feminism. All the men and women she could have saved need feminism too. The cure for cancer is buried deep within the girl’s mind and she needs education to set it free.

An ambitious young woman studying eagerly needs feminism. At the end of the day she gets the lower income anyway.

Some very weird trees found deep in the tropical rainforests need feminism. Damn those sexist trees.

The boy who hasn’t even got a word yet needs feminism. He’s the male equivalent of a tomboy. Why would a man want to resemble anything traditionally considered feminine?

I need feminism because sometimes I feel like an empty shell being painted by others in colours they think would suit me.

I need feminism because I believe people should be seen and treated as individuals.

I need feminism because this list could go on and on and on. I haven’t even scratched the surface.

I need feminism because I am not just my gender.

I am

so

much

more.

 

Do you need feminism?

Revenge Porn

There is an idea in our culture that it is something other than the lack of consent and the severity of the assault, that determines whether a sexual assault has occurred or not. That something is the victim’s behavior before the assault and the victim’s behavior after the assault. But most recently another prospect has come up; society’s attitude to sexuality in general.

Not so long ago, a Swedish girl was filmed by her boyfriend while they had sex, without her knowledge. Later he uploaded the video on the net, and before she found out about it had already spread to several pornsites. The boyfriend was sentenced by the district court to compensate the girl for the damages done to her, but The Court of Appeal greatly reduced the compensation he had to pay. The argument for this was that one can not ignore the fact that it is socially acceptable in certain social circles to be open regarding sexual habits.

In this way The Court of Apperal connects one scenario – that it’s socially acceptable today to share sextapes and photos of yourself online – with a completely different scenario, what happened to the girl. These two scenarios are not the same thing and do not have the connection that The Court of Appereral state. What the girl really had to go through is called revenge porn in common speech. Revenge porn is to publish pornographic images or videos of people online without their consent. It’s called “revenge porn” because the one who commits this crime usually is the victim’s ex, who after the relationship ended spread these images/videos in retaliation.

Many people today think that the way to tackle this problem is to give young girls more and more instructions about how they should behave, in order to avoid exposing themselves to dangerous conditions. Many focuse on what the victims should have done to not get put on a pornsite, and that those who are so naive to provide pictures of themselves to their boyfriends basically have themselves to blame. This is normally society’s reaction every time a new threat against girls is discovered (now with the phenomenon of revenge porn), to tell them to adapt to the new situations in order to protect themselves. The efforts to reduce the number of crimes of this kind targets the victims, and not the perpetrators.

This must come to an end. This idea that the victim is to blame affects both men and women negatively. It is from the traditional view that women can, and should adapt their lives in order to avoid these crimes, that the idea of all men being “potential perpetrators ” comes from.

It is time that we, on a societal level, start focusing on the perpetrators and not the victims. We must also stop confusing consensual sexual situations with involuntary. A person’s history of uploading sex on the internet, cannot be used against a victim of revenge porn, for these are different situations. We must begin to understand that consent, or the lack of it, is the only thing that is important in determining whether a sexual assault occurred or not as well as and how serious it is.